With Smooch Day quickly approaching, I’ve seen a ton of questions from women about what to get their husbands.
Can I challenge you to think about, not what you’re going to get him, but what you are going to do for him? Everyone can run out and buy some candy and a cute knick knack, but what do men really want for Valentine’s Day?
Below, you will find 5 ideas for Valentine’s Day that challenge you to look beyond the typical Valentine’s gifts and use this time to invest in your relationship. Should you do this everyday? Well, yes…but there’s nothing wrong with making this day extra special.
No babysitter? No excuse. There is something for everyone here. Will it take a bit of pre-planning? Yes, but if your relationship isn’t worth the time invested, what is?
Turning Back Time
This takes a bit of effort, but I promise it’ll be a Valentine’s Day he’ll never forget. This idea came to me one evening when my husband and I were talking about prom. It may be silly, but I sat there thinking about how I wish I had been part of it.
If you’ve had the pleasure of knowing your honey since high school, maybe you went to prom with him, but most of us didn’t. You don’t have to spend a ton of money on this, but any money spent on an experience versus a typical Valentine’s Day gift is going to be well worth the investment.
- Think about the theme of your prom night. Is there something your partner is particularly interested in? If you can’t think of a particular theme, focus on your relationship together. You can use pictures from the past, experiences, and use this time to get excited about the future.
- The Invite- Start his day off by inviting him to prom! Depending on your theme, you can come up with some super creative ways to ask him. For example, if it’s a car theme, leave the invitation in his car attached to a new air freshener. He’ll see it in the morning and have all day to get excited. If your theme is a masquerade, leave him a mask with the invitation attached. If your theme is sports, make the invite into a ticket. The sky is the limit!
- Menu- Think of a pre-prom dinner that he would like. You can decorate the space, create a menu card, light some candles, create a game, etc.
- Don’t forget about your dress! Pull that formal out of the closet and dust it off, buy something inexpensive, or just put on your favorite dress.
- Music- Create a playlist of his favorite songs. Set up a dance area . If you really want a challenge, create a dance together and record it to look back on later.
- Don’t forget the photos! Set up a photo area and take pictures of the evening together. Use the timer on your phone or if you have a tripod and camera, use that. This would be a great way to start a photo album or scrapbook of your dates together.
First Date Recreate
I was so nervous before meeting my husband. After a terrible divorce, I hadn’t dated in years. I had tried some online dating sites and was very picky about who I even let get to the actual date stage.
That afternoon, I went and got my hair done and was dressed hours before it was time to leave. I wish I would have gotten more pictures of the evening, but of course we were a little busy living in the moment. I sent my best girl friend this picture and asked her if I looked okay. Then I walked out the door, not knowing I was about to meet my future husband. Funny how that happens.
There’s something about recreating your first date that helps you remember why you fell in love with your partner in the first place.
Think about what you wore, the activities you participated in, the conversations you had, the order of events, and anything else special about the evening.
Try your best to remember what you wore during your date and do your best to recreate it. Mine is easy since I still have the original dress I wore. Even better? Do you remember what he wore?
My man wore a white t-shirt and jeans and although he usually wears a hat, he wasn’t wearing one that evening because he had just gotten a haircut. He gets his hair cut at a Mexican barber who creates hair art, so he’s always coming home with fun hair. Before I met him, I thought, “Who is this punk?” Now that I know him, I think it’s cute that he likes to do it. Funny how first impressions can be completely off track sometimes.
Chances are, you went to eat something together. Where did you go? Is it a place you can go again? If not, try to choose something similar.
We met at a downtown restaurant. I arrived first and was way too early so I sat, wiggling in the seat of my car, staring down the road anxiously for his silver truck to appear. When I finally saw his truck, I felt panicked, but convinced myself to get out of my car and walk over to him. If love at first sight was one word in the dictionary, it would have our name next to it. The attraction was immediate.
The restaurant was busy so we opted to sit outside. At the time, we were the only people sitting out there and had a chance to talk before ordering our food. I was attracted to him immediately and got really good, honest, genuine vibes from him. He was warm, gentle, and kind – a true gentleman.
Think back to that time. Did he pick you up? Did you pick him up? Did you meet at the destination? How did you feel? What was your favorite part? Talk about it over dinner.
What activities did you participate in? We were scheduled to play an Escape Room game. Knowing my husband now, I laugh just thinking about how calm he remained when things didn’t go as planned. We arrived at the Escape Game and the owner told us that unfortunately, their machine stopped working and it would be impossible to play the game without it. They gave us a refund and told us that the next game would be on the house. So instead of playing the game as planned, we were left trying to think of a Plan B and I was impressed by how easily he recovered from his plan not working out.
We ended up finding this small beer company who specialized in growlers, a container that can be filled with the beer of your choice and taken home with you. You could also sit down at a table, order a flight of beer, and watch a game. We found a table, sat down, tried some different beers, and talked for hours.
State of the Marriage
The State of the Marriage date is the perfect date for Valentine’s Day because it lands in February- the start of the year. It may sound a bit business like, but for the health of your marriage, it’s imperative.
The intention for this date is similar to the intent for the State of the Union address and/or the State of the Church address that many churches have at the beginning of the calendar year. That is, to discuss the previous year and make goals and dreams for the future. It’s a way to keep yourself and others accountable by making it public. It’s also a wonderful way to bring to light the things that aren’t working and come up with solutions for making them work for both of you. This would be a great Valentine tradition to start!
Task #1 – Gather supplies
- Poster Board, cork board, or computer paper
- Lined Paper
- State of the Marriage Activity
Task #2 – Complete State of the Marriage Activity
I’m pretty passionate about the health of marriages. For this reason, I spent a lot of time preparing this document and I want to make sure you get it for free. You can get your free copy by clicking the picture or the link.
This can be a casual thing – make dinner together and discuss it over dinner. It can also be a more formal thing – put dinner away and sit down together in a place where you can give each other your undivided attention.
Task #3- Create a Vision Board
This board can be created on a poster board, a cork board, foam board, or just a piece of computer paper if you want something on a smaller scale. I like the idea of using something larger because you can hang it somewhere like the master closet as a reminder to stay focused on your shared goals and dreams.
After completing the State of the Marriage activity, you will create a vision board together. A vision board is a tool where you display images of things that represent your goals and dreams for the future. You will take your conversation from the State of the Marriage activity and transfer it into pictures. You can cut these images out of magazines, print them off from online, or draw them yourself.
This date is perfect for couples who are able to get away from home. It is the most time consuming out of the five ideas because it requires you to do a lot of planning in advance. But it’s so much fun and will be one of the greatest Valentine’s Days he has ever had. I promise!
The purpose of The Hunt is to create a Scavenger Hunt game where you lead him from one place to the next with clues.
Step 1: Think of a theme – What is he interested in? Depending on where you live, you may have more or less options for your scavenger hunt, so you may need to get super creative. Bonus points if you can turn each clue into a new line of a poem.
Example Scavenger Hunt Theme: The Roaring Twenties
First Stop: I would start by giving him a card that leads him to an outfit. Try to use what you already have. I’d probably choose some suspenders and a cool hat.
Give him a hint about the evening and leave the clue to his next stop.
Second Stop: The second stop would be getting twenties themed photos taken to remember the day. You can do this the weekend before Valentine’s Day if it falls on a weekday or do it early that evening. If you can’t afford a photographer, use your smart phone, bring along a friend, or use a tripod and take them yourself!
Third Stop: We have a cool restaurant in downtown Nashville that reminds me of a small speakeasy because of its inconspicuous location. It’s called Skulls Rainbow Room and it’s a hole in the wall. It’s very dark inside and you must make a reservation, but it’s a really cool atmosphere.
Fourth Stop: You could either go dancing or find a place to get a drink and hang out.
Fifth Stop: After all that dancing, a nice end to the evening might be some champagne and a bubble bath! Who knows, maybe there will be some more dancing first. 😉
This date is the perfect at home date and a great way to remember the occasion. Tonight, you will create a video together. The goal is for the video to be a way to reflect on why you chose each other, what you love about each other, and what you’re excited about for the future.
Smart phone or video camera
A list of questions
You can use the questions provided in the free document or come up with your own! Be as creative as you can. It might be a good thing to show your children one day. It’s also a great reminder of why you fell in love with each other in the first place.
I wish I had the time and energy to put into planning one of these dates this year, but with a due date of Valentine’s Day, I can’t really think of a better gift to give him than a sweet baby boy.
*This is in no way a suggestion to attempt a due date of your own. 😉
What other ideas do you have that go against the traditional Valentine gift? Lets hear ’em!